More From Jerry Seinfeld
- "A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it."
- "The IRS! They’re like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!"
- "Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome."
More In Funny
- "It is only after one is in trouble that one realizes how little sympathy and kindness there are in the world."― Nellie Bly
- "Chevy Chase and Bill Murray – we thought those guys were funny. We love Bill Murray, but we didn’t think they were right for Airplane! because it would step on the joke if there was a known comedian."― David Zucker
- "Absolutely, there is a connection between food and love. I always say, when there’s love in my heart or I’m feeling particularly good, the food comes out that much better. And so I think Valentine’s Day is a special day."― Todd English