"If at first you don’t succeed, find out if the loser gets anything." ― William Lyon Phelps Topic(s): Funny More From William Lyon Phelps "This is the final test of a gentleman: his respect for those who can be of no possible service to him." "If happiness truly consisted in physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow." "A student never forgets an encouraging private word, when it is given with sincere respect and admiration." More In Funny "You need to be silly to be funny."― William Shatner "Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease."― Bill Maher "As writers and readers, as sinners and citizens, our realism and our aesthetic sense make us wary of crediting the positive note."― Seamus Heaney