More From Mark Twain
- "If it’s your job to eat a frog, it’s best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it’s your job to eat two frogs, it’s best to eat the biggest one first."
- "My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water."
- "When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain."
More In Funny
- "I got to play with Nintendo’s Wii, yes it’s a funny name and not very revolutionary but it was fun whipping your arms around."― Olivia Munn
- "Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas."― Johnny Carson
- "People just don’t laugh when their family is violated, and you don’t shrug it off. You band together and you defend together. It’s a funny, primitive instinct."― Phillip Noyce