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- "Y’know, you can’t please all the people all the time… and last night, all those people were at my show."― Mitch Hedberg
- "In solitude the mind gains strength and learns to lean upon itself."― Laurence Sterne
- "Australia is so cool that it’s hard to even know where to start describing it. The beaches are beautiful; so is the weather. Not too crowded. Great food, great music, really nice people. It must be a lot like Los Angeles was many years ago."― Mary-Kate Olsen