More From Emo Philips
- "Probably the worst time in a person’s life is when they have to kill a family member because they are the devil. But otherwise it’s been a pretty good day."
- "Women: You can’t live with them, and you can’t get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something."
- "I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator."
More In Humor
- "James Cagney, Steve McQueen, I loved all those guys. I grew up loving the movies but had no desire to be in them."― Mark Wahlberg
- "While it is true that Frank had a great sense of humor, he was also very serious about composing music. In reality there are only a handful of skilled players who can play his most complex pieces. It takes a lot of patience to learn and requires a fantastic memory."― Dweezil Zappa
- "Humor can be an incredible lacerating and effective weapon. And that is the way I use it."― Carl Hiaasen