"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it." ― W. C. Fields Topic(s): Funny More From W. C. Fields "It’s morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money." "Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against." "Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water." More In Funny "A dramatic thing, the first time you stand up to your dad."― Lenny Kravitz "I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut."― Ellen DeGeneres "If at first you don’t succeed… so much for skydiving."― Henny Youngman