"I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing ‘Happy Birthday.’"
― Steven Wright
Topic(s):
Birthday
More From Steven Wright
- "Babies don’t need a vacation, but I still see them at the beach… it pisses me off! I’ll go over to a little baby and say ‘What are you doing here? You haven’t worked a day in your life!’"
- "For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out."
- "I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he’s gone."
More In Birthday
- "It’s odd the things that people remember. Parents will arrange a birthday party, certain it will stick in your mind forever. You’ll have a nice time, then two years later you’ll be like, ‘There was a pony there? Really? And a clown with one leg?’"― David Sedaris
- "I tried to bake a cake for my mother’s birthday – it took me four hours. It was terrible, and I cried for three days."― Rachael Ray
- "The worst part about celebrating another birthday is the shock that you’re only as well as you are."― Anne Lamott