"I don’t excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor." ― Joan Rivers Topic(s): God More From Joan Rivers "Comediennes are the lucky ones, because if you’re funny, you can be 125 years old and they will still accept you." "The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it." "What are people going to do? Fire me? I’ve been fired before. Not book me? I’ve been out of work before. I don’t care." More In God "Religion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don’t need."― Bill Maher "Technology tools such as laptops are the kind of help that we need. A program that provides laptops for all youngsters would close a gap that most of us are not aware of, or will not admit to, which is a tremendous gap in the poor communities."― Major Owens "Every knee will bend before me, and every tongue shall give glory to God."― Jesus Christ