"If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late." ― Henny Youngman Topic(s): Funny More From Henny Youngman "If at first you don’t succeed… so much for skydiving." "Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport." "The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret." More In Funny "The fact that the Kardashians could be more popular than a show like ‘Mad Men’ is disgusting. It’s a super disgusting part of our culture, but I still find it funny to make a joke about it."― Jonah Hill "I think it’s always funny when you see kids do Shakespeare."― Steve Coogan "You see much more of your children once they leave home."― Lucille Ball