"I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there." ― Fred Allen Topic(s): Funny More From Fred Allen "Television is a medium because anything well done is rare." "My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense." "The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion." More In Funny "What I am is how I came out. No one’s perfect and you just have to accept your flaws and learn to love yourself."― Kelly Brook "I always tell people that to be the funny person in a Steve Martin movie is like getting a call that Keith Moon wants you to play drums on his record. He should be playing drums on his record."― Jason Schwartzman "I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business."― Wanda Sykes