More From Dave Barry
- "Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling."
- "The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number."
- "The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes."
More In Funny
- "You shouldn’t be afraid of failure – when something fails, you think, ‘What did I learn from that experience? I can do better next time.’ Then kill that project and move on to the next. Don’t get disappointed."― Niklas Zennstrom
- "It’s funny how most activists are pacifists."― Craig Bruce
- "If I had to live my life again, I’d make the same mistakes, only sooner."― Tallulah Bankhead